Caught in my Own Trap (作茧自缚) : Chapter 6.1

Cen Shi never gives up trying to get Xiao He He to meet him for a meal……. will He He finally give in and meet her ex? Should we really remember what should be remembered and forget what should be forgotten just like the proverbs say? 

Chapter 6.1 : Don’t care is a good punishment

Proverbs say: Remember what should be remembered, and forget what should be forgotten.

But we often: Remember the forgotten, forget what should be remembered.

Cen Shi called again. Xiao He He is not surprised but still refused him with just 2 words. She is not showing any attitude, but suddenly she had additional workload that she need to get back to work on.

Later Cen Shi called again for the fourth time. He He knew that she cannot escape it anymore so decided to take an early break. She agreed to meet him on Friday night to meet at “Pavillion Road.”

The venue is chosen by He He so of course Cen Shi understand her intentions. Such a place with no festive images name, plain decorations but somehow the business is surprisingly good, showing the submissiveness of He He.

Haven’t met for so many years, Cen Shi still have not changed much. Just looking so much more mature adding to his attractiveness.

Xiao He He compares his changes in her heart and feels that it is a great change. Without any meaning to complain but with a calm and peaceful hear, discover his bright spot, showing how broad-minded she has become.

“He He, you have become more beautiful now.” Cen Shi said, with appreciative eyes just like a mild amiable big brother.

Xiao He He did not quite know what to say, thought for a long time and said: “Cen Shi, you are more handsome now,” she finished with a hallow laugh or two.

Such a bad opening, the atmosphere the night becomes very awkward. Xiao He He is not a person with a good communication skills, does not know how to deal with the scene and becomes more and more uncomfortable. She counted the layer of the lights, researched the waitress and waiter style of dressing and even memories half of the items on the menu but did not listen clearly to what Cen Shi is saying. To a certain degress, Cen Shi said words with a question mark only, He He asked: “ah?”

Cen Shi maintaining his full patience and grace, slowly asked: “He He, you still hate me. I…….”

“No” Xiao He He rebound and quickly repair the situation. “Cen Shi, your ‘sorry’ is not necessary and you have said it before. Resentment is derived from strong emotion. Towards you, the affections are not that deep.”

Cen Shi is very frustrated in his heart. He looked at Xiao He He who is sitting opposite of him. She looked at him just as intense. In a blink of an eye, the thought drifted. He clearly remembers that she is 25 years old, obviously passed the youth. But her facial features and small yet exquisite body is still refreshing and simple. Yet occasionally with a light touch, will always jump with remarks, just like how it was before.

Back then he felt that she is like a cat, curled up quietly, half-squint and lazy. When bullied by people, she show her indifference like there is no care in her world. But if anyone crossed her bottom line, she will immediately exposed her sharp claws and teething, therefore showing them some colors.

Thinking back to the past, his heart felt a little warm. Even though sitting across him, Xiao He He turned away from looking at him. She is so good, at least she did not forget him. Although she only took him as her mentor, not minding the past, he felt more frustrated at the moment. But he understands that as a woman, she is no longer the Xiao He He that he knew.

In the bathroom, Xiao He He looked at herself in the mirror. Just after dinner, Cen Shi was about to pay the bill, she left her meal on the table and turned away to the toilet to wash her face. She had washed it several times. This is because, with the water on her face, even she herself cannot tell if there are any flow of tears.

She has return to couldn’t care less temperament. In front of Cen Shi, she never had any care. Although others take her as a joke, obviously a Cinderella but pretending to be a princess, it is something that she cannot change.

He He’s childhood and teenage years are actually nice, calm and happy. Although her father gad dedicated his life in the line of duty, her mother’s entire life is dedicated to the same cause. Because both her parents are orphans, she does not have any other relatives in the world. But this was never her concern.

Zheng Xie has a large family. In addition to Zheng Xie’s mother, Aunty Qian also regards her as her own child. Zheng Xie’s stern father, for her is exceptionally tender. Even Zheng Xie’s strict and tough aunty and uncles are very friendly to her. To the extend, those teachers and students in her university years are friendly. This is because He He has a patience, calm and lovely smile. She is pretty although not stunning, performance neither good nor bad, she never post as a threat to anyone.

He He knows that such caring and friendliness, is not entirely because of her own.

Zheng Xie family treat her well only because Zheng Xie is the family’s previous son. Because of the poor health of Aunty Qian, she treats her very well. Teachers and students treats her well because there is a noble family backing her up and also because she has a very admirable father and a great scientist mother.

While this is the fact, she actually had no real friends that she is able to talk to as friend. Her position is a little embarrassing. Although she is an ordinary girl, people treat her as a princess hence do not want to be her close friends. Those girls with good family also treated her as an outcast.

Her closest friends are those guy friends of Zheng Xie whom are 4 to 5 years older than her. Because they rarely have little sister, they loved and took great care of her.

Thus in Xiao He He’s childhood and youth, she had been happy although slightly lonely. As Zheng Xie’s shadow, she was happy.

He He would not because of this, would deliberately make herself look like a hedgehog nor deliberately took advantage of other’s goodwill. She is not regarded as a spoilt brad that forgets who she really was.

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